I don't often spend time on LJ, but I some how found yours through Jeff Bigler. You probably do not remember me, but I grew up in the folk music and dance community in Boston and I knew you (casually) when I was a child and adolescent. My father danced on Red Herring for a number of years and I danced with Banbury, Great Meadows and a now-retired rapper team.
I think your observation about the climate of this community (or at least how it was went I moved out of the region, 6 years ago) is accurate. While so many people would consider themselves "socially liberal" and "open minded", transphobia is so rampant. It is particularly true for anyone over the age of 30 and MTF folk. Younger people seem to be able to get away with more and FTM folk either pass, get read as lesbians, or don't threaten the liberal gender binary in quite the same way.
Of course, some of this is built into our culture as morris dancers. Gender play is fun when sexy young male dancers where skirts and fling their partners around the dance floor. The mummers play and our other theatrical traditions are enhanced by middle aged men dressing in bad drag for a great laugh. Is that a problem in and of itself? Not necessarily. The problem is that there seems to be no distinction between gender play and gender identity. While I'm sure most people would not admit to it when asked directly, they are uncomfortable with gender transition. It becomes obvious when it's time to find a dance partner, when a trans person tries to get an "in" with a new team, and, of course, whenever a transperson leaves a room full of cisgendered people... because that's when the muffled giggled begin. And when called out on that kind of despicable behavior, the classic excuses come flooding out: "I'm not saying they are a bad PERSON, I'm just saying that IF they're going to do something like that, they could just make it a little more convincing." or "Oh, don't give me that! I didn't grow up around this stuff, it's all a little weird to me!" or "I've known that person for YEARS, they cannot possibly believe I could just start calling them by a different name and thinking of them as the opposite sex! Besides, they never seemed to want to change before." To all of that, we're supposed to nod and transfer the burden of acceptance to the person being marginalized.
I was lucky in that my generation of dancers were born into this community after LGB folks had paved the way for us. A good number of the children I grew up with are now queer adults and no one seemed to bat an eye. I don't know what generation of dancers created that environment for us, but I have hopes that this generation (and the next) can take things a step further and open the dialog surrounding gender in this community. In the mean time, I am so sorry to hear that this is your experience.
no subject
I think your observation about the climate of this community (or at least how it was went I moved out of the region, 6 years ago) is accurate. While so many people would consider themselves "socially liberal" and "open minded", transphobia is so rampant. It is particularly true for anyone over the age of 30 and MTF folk. Younger people seem to be able to get away with more and FTM folk either pass, get read as lesbians, or don't threaten the liberal gender binary in quite the same way.
Of course, some of this is built into our culture as morris dancers. Gender play is fun when sexy young male dancers where skirts and fling their partners around the dance floor. The mummers play and our other theatrical traditions are enhanced by middle aged men dressing in bad drag for a great laugh. Is that a problem in and of itself? Not necessarily. The problem is that there seems to be no distinction between gender play and gender identity. While I'm sure most people would not admit to it when asked directly, they are uncomfortable with gender transition. It becomes obvious when it's time to find a dance partner, when a trans person tries to get an "in" with a new team, and, of course, whenever a transperson leaves a room full of cisgendered people... because that's when the muffled giggled begin. And when called out on that kind of despicable behavior, the classic excuses come flooding out: "I'm not saying they are a bad PERSON, I'm just saying that IF they're going to do something like that, they could just make it a little more convincing." or "Oh, don't give me that! I didn't grow up around this stuff, it's all a little weird to me!" or "I've known that person for YEARS, they cannot possibly believe I could just start calling them by a different name and thinking of them as the opposite sex! Besides, they never seemed to want to change before."
To all of that, we're supposed to nod and transfer the burden of acceptance to the person being marginalized.
I was lucky in that my generation of dancers were born into this community after LGB folks had paved the way for us. A good number of the children I grew up with are now queer adults and no one seemed to bat an eye. I don't know what generation of dancers created that environment for us, but I have hopes that this generation (and the next) can take things a step further and open the dialog surrounding gender in this community.
In the mean time, I am so sorry to hear that this is your experience.