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The past year.
Jul. 12th, 2011 09:10 pmSLCC is exactly a month away now, and we're also approaching the anniversary of my first time out as Shirley (July 17 for an SL meetup and TraniWreck; see ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
shirleymarquez for more). Reaching milestones (or millstones?) always makes me stop and reflect on where I have gone and where I am going.
First, the various significant dates: May 28 when I decided to attend SLCC as Shirley, July 17 when I first went out, August 12-15 were SLCC, There was lots of stuff in the fall, notable Transgender Pride in Northampton in October and Transcending Boundaries in November. Winter brought the two Shirley Weeks (February 2-9 and March 13-19), and I went to living as a woman full time (with the slight exception of dancing with the Black Jokers and going to the 40th anniversary event for Carolingia as my male SCA persona) on the first day of spring, March 20. Life since then has been a series of comings out: doing the things I've been doing for years like NEFFA, May Morning, Lilac Sunday, the Dog Days Ale, and Lobstercon are all changed by my transition. I'll have more to say about that last one in another post.
So... how is it going so far? First, I continue to be pleased by the amount of acceptance that I have experienced. Some communities were no surprise at all; the Susboids, for example; they've seen it all before. Some were a slight surprise, like the morris community; I knew the local dancers would be fine but was less certain about the ones from other places who I don't know as well. The ham radio community at Lobstercon was a concern -- they're more conservative than most of the people I hang out with most of the time -- but it mostly went well.
I've also been happy with the way things have been going in other settings. I had a great time helping make the Dyke March happen this year; I wasn't merely a marcher, I was in the organizing committee. (As I put it, they were happy to get an extra pair of hands even if they are too large to get most bracelets around.) Stepping in as Shirley and helping make things happen started with SLCC, and I see it as part of the definition of the kind of woman I want to be.
Casual encounters with people have been a pleasure; people smile at me more in stores and in the subway, and I've run into new people in various places and had pleasant conversations. I've been to Queeraoke a number of times and it's almost always fun. Once I went and it wasn't fun, but I think that just meant I was in the wrong mood that night.
What I'm maybe less thrilled with is my inability to move things along more quickly. I have now passed my self-imposed deadline of one year after Marian's death before doing anything permanent physically, but financial limitations now stand in the way and probably will for some time to come. (I've got quite a way to go just to get to broke!) I'd like to have some hair removal done and start taking hormones, both of which would make me feel more like a woman and make it easier to pass, but neither is going to happen soon.
But... I won't let that stop me. As Lady Gaga sang, "I'm on the right track baby, I was born to be brave." All along I've just gone out and did things and not worried about perfection (though I talk them to death among my Second Life friends first so I can't chicken out!) and I'm not going to stop living that way.
shirleymarquez for more). Reaching milestones (or millstones?) always makes me stop and reflect on where I have gone and where I am going.First, the various significant dates: May 28 when I decided to attend SLCC as Shirley, July 17 when I first went out, August 12-15 were SLCC, There was lots of stuff in the fall, notable Transgender Pride in Northampton in October and Transcending Boundaries in November. Winter brought the two Shirley Weeks (February 2-9 and March 13-19), and I went to living as a woman full time (with the slight exception of dancing with the Black Jokers and going to the 40th anniversary event for Carolingia as my male SCA persona) on the first day of spring, March 20. Life since then has been a series of comings out: doing the things I've been doing for years like NEFFA, May Morning, Lilac Sunday, the Dog Days Ale, and Lobstercon are all changed by my transition. I'll have more to say about that last one in another post.
So... how is it going so far? First, I continue to be pleased by the amount of acceptance that I have experienced. Some communities were no surprise at all; the Susboids, for example; they've seen it all before. Some were a slight surprise, like the morris community; I knew the local dancers would be fine but was less certain about the ones from other places who I don't know as well. The ham radio community at Lobstercon was a concern -- they're more conservative than most of the people I hang out with most of the time -- but it mostly went well.
I've also been happy with the way things have been going in other settings. I had a great time helping make the Dyke March happen this year; I wasn't merely a marcher, I was in the organizing committee. (As I put it, they were happy to get an extra pair of hands even if they are too large to get most bracelets around.) Stepping in as Shirley and helping make things happen started with SLCC, and I see it as part of the definition of the kind of woman I want to be.
Casual encounters with people have been a pleasure; people smile at me more in stores and in the subway, and I've run into new people in various places and had pleasant conversations. I've been to Queeraoke a number of times and it's almost always fun. Once I went and it wasn't fun, but I think that just meant I was in the wrong mood that night.
What I'm maybe less thrilled with is my inability to move things along more quickly. I have now passed my self-imposed deadline of one year after Marian's death before doing anything permanent physically, but financial limitations now stand in the way and probably will for some time to come. (I've got quite a way to go just to get to broke!) I'd like to have some hair removal done and start taking hormones, both of which would make me feel more like a woman and make it easier to pass, but neither is going to happen soon.
But... I won't let that stop me. As Lady Gaga sang, "I'm on the right track baby, I was born to be brave." All along I've just gone out and did things and not worried about perfection (though I talk them to death among my Second Life friends first so I can't chicken out!) and I'm not going to stop living that way.
